My mother is a narcissist and it took me 30+ years to figure it out! Now that I have, everything in my life looks so much different and I am finally able to heal and deal with things much more clearly. Some of these stories I wrote before I realized the truth and some after. I have an entire series of books I’m currently writing that cover many of these similar stories and events in much more depth. A few of these you may recognize from the first book.
*Unfortunately the majority of my family is still in denial of this fact and stuck in the cycle of abuse.
2012-2014
2. I’ve got a Brand New Pair of Roller Skates
6. Super Sandman & the Hand Gun
7. Dead Brothers are No Fun at All
11. Moon Crashers
12. Pole Dancer
13. Slaughtered Straight Jackets
*For more on the subject, please head over to this thread to find out what has happened in my adult life: How Everything Changed*
Oh I’M soooo reading your threads. I just discovered my narcissist mother in therapy less than a year ago. Mind blowing S$|&!!!!
Good luck:-)
Ps Google a book and website about daughters of narcissistic mothers… Either for research or for therapy:-)
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Thanks N.R.M! Isn’t the discovery MIND BLOWING?! YES! I have been on many of those sites and read more every day.
It was actually finding datingasociopath.com that led me to discover I was serial dating sociopaths…the more I dug the more I learned until I finally realized the pattern was created by my mom.
Here’s to the future! Best of luck to you in your own journey!
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I’m huge on the MBTI, it’s amazing to see why people are the way they are based on how they perceive and process information from the world. Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, you should look into it.
Also I like the format of your blog.
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INFJ!
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INFJ is a really intriguing type. I don’t know any very well. Have you known or did you just take the test?
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I followed your suggestion 😉
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Woooo, make sure you look into those cognitive functions.
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Sorry to hear that. But glad you’ve come to realize this dilemma and have the courage to point it out. Thank you for sharing. I’ve dealt with a few narcissists in my lifetime and it is very difficult.
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Life changing, aren’t they?
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Yea. Scars take a long time to heal, but eventually they become reminders of the strength we had to persevere and forgive.
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Yep
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btw…love the hair in that pic!
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HAHAHA
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I haven’t seen the bitch since I was 14, who says teenagers are stupid!
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Sociopaths aren’t all bad
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Says who, liar?! You think that they aren’t all bad?! Then you try being antagonized by them.
Besides, this gal’s against sociopaths and so is one of her supporters.
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That must have been a hard realization. Who wants to admit their parent is anything but wonderful. Best wishes in your path ahead!
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Thanks A. It was actually the opposite. My mother was anything but wonderful and finally having an answer as to why not only made things easier to handle, it changed my perspective and gave me the peace I was searching for.
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A wind tunnel of refreshing energy. Congratulations on discovering the narcissism so endemic in society – especially targeting mothers! It takes courage to dig deep and undo the damage that was done in our childhood. Turning it around with humour and creativity is not only healing but essential. Take care.
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Thanks for your support M.K!
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I’m with you all the way on this. The problem is living with it , overcoming the results but not overreacting I have eventually honoured her many qualities while learning to protect myself from the poisonous rebuff that was her narcissistic essence. Frightening stuff which few will understand if they have not experienced. Have you found The Wounded Warrior site.(Jan le Frayne) My poem Two Brothers is posted there. You might like it and certainly the site in general
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Overreacting! Yes, I’m working in that one for sure!
That’s John, I will be reading!
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Posted and linked: “Raised By a #Narcissist” Facing Hard Truths http://wp.me/p2120g-245 via @johndwm
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I’m all too familiar with what you’re talking about. And it’s so sad that as adults people still think it’s their business to try and guilt us about maintaining boundaries with this soul-sucking, devious, dishonest behavior. If we don’t distance ourselves from it, we have a much higher chance of becoming the same way.
I covered some of the blaming behaviors in a blog post called “Blaming the Victims.” Denial– something you pointed out– was discussed in here too. I’ve concluded that it’s easier for people to come down on the victims and try to manipulate them than face the reality that the perpetrator is a narcissist whose world revolves around themselves.
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Glad to meet another survivor! Thanks Ninja! Ill be reading more if you’re blog as well! Hugs!
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Wow, I never knew you had a narcissistic mom. If you ask me, I have a narcissistic dad, who I think is worse than your mom. One example is that he’s sexist to your gender.
As far as I’m concerned, I care nothing for my dad because of all the trouble that he gave me throughout most of my time growing up.
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i love your blog
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Thanks Poet! ❤
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Cool, I’m glad I’m not alone in ‘walking away’. It takes an enormous amount of courage to do what you did. Because of my decision, my siblings mostly don’t even speak to me any more but I had to override all of that social pressure to be free, creative and happy.
The difficult thing is that society reinforces that simply being a parent is a virtue… ‘honour thy father and thy mother’, ‘mothers day’, ‘fathers day’. This is why it takes courage. Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks Kieran! It’s glad to know another person who understands!
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You’re not alone. I was raised by a narcissist-sociopath-abusive-monster of a “mother”, and my siblings turned out no differently. I was the one who lucked out. Well, sort of. My younger brother, my eldest niece, a former friend, and an anonymous e-mail stalker have teamed up over the past year to stalk me across the Internet and spread lies about me in order to make my life even more of a living hell than it is already. So yeah, I can relate to much of what you’re going through.
The thing to remember is that you’re probably not mentally ill. (And I only say “probably” because I only just discovered your blog this morning after you liked one of my entries, so I really don’t know you well enough to say for certain—but you don’t strike me as being crazy.) That dubious honor belongs to the psychopath who birthed you, and the other psychopaths who are part of your life making it hell.
Stay strong, and know you’re not alone. Catch me on Facebook if you ever need to vent.
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Thanks Michael!
Sorry to hear that you have to endure this shit too! It’s amazing how they mange to team up, isn’t it?
Sorry you have to go through it too, but glad I’m not alone!
Hugs!
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Hey, in a world as crowded as this, no one’s ever truly alone. We just choose to isolate ourselves from one another. But as long as we who have suffered can communicate and take comfort in knowing we have shared experiences, then it can help us cope better. Best of luck to you!
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It always sucks when you’re the only one who discovers the true nature of your parents’ destructive narcissistic patterns and the rest of the family remains in vehement denial of the incontrovertible truth of it all. As a young man who grew up in “Trauma Central” (what I call my childhood home), I look forward to reading all your stories. Sounds like we’ve braved many of the same dark waters …
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Thanks John! It’s always wonderful meeting another survivor!
“Trama central!” That sure sums it up!
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I also have a traumatized life.
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She’s not the only one who has been through many bad times.
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Ummm… okay?
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